Family mediation is a conflict-resolution approach in which an impartial mediator assists spouses or partners in negotiating a fair, viable agreement that addresses each family member’s needs and is entered into voluntarily. The mediator supports both parties in making informed decisions about their family’s future and aims to help them avoid costly and emotionally draining court battles. Mediation discussions will focus on the children’s best interests.
Ms. Bourgeois advocates for child-inclusive mediation, wherein she conducts interviews with children to maintain a focus on their distinct needs, experiences, and preferences.
Family and Parent Mediations
When are they useful?
Benefits of Child-Inclusive or Child-Inclusive Mediation
- Parents may resolve their differences respectfully and comfortably.
- Rather than having a third-party judge or arbitrator impose their agreement, parents can tailor it to their family’s needs.
- Helps parents restructure their communication and expectations from those of an intimate relationship to those of a co-parenting relationship.
- Helps reduce parental conflict surrounding the child.
- Parents avoid the adversarial process of engaging opposing counsel and entering the court system to help resolve conflicts regarding their children.
- More buy-in from the parents since they both collaborated in the process.
- Creative parenting plans can be implemented with check-ins with the children to see how they are adapting.
- The final mediated agreement is oriented around the child’s needs and the realities of the family. Reaching a resolution provides both parents (and their children by extension) a sense of security and peace.
- Children can be interviewed to obtain their views and preferences to help inform discussions and keep them child-focused.
- The mediator can conduct interviews with relevant collateral sources to inform the discussions.
Family Mediation Details
Issues addressed during Mediation
- Informing the children about the separation and helping them adapt to family changes.
- Parental decision-making authority about important decisions affecting the child (schooling, health, religion, etc.).
- Parenting schedules during the school year, holiday times, and summer period.
- Develop a plan to help parents communicate in a healthy manner and minimize children’s exposure to conflict.
- Parental responsibilities: who brings children to various appointments (e.g., medical, dental, orthodontic, counselling, etc.).
- Children’s activities, sports, routines, homework, etc.
- Children’s special needs and how to best respond to and address them.
- New partners and blending of families
- Developing common parenting approaches to ensure stability and consistency in both homes.
- Substance misuse, mental health, parenting concerns, etc.
- Children resisting or refusing contact with another parent.
- Children’s expenses and support.
- Co-parenting education and support.
Summary of Mediated Agreements
- A summary of mediated agreements can be prepared to reflect interim agreements after individual sessions, and a final agreement forms the basis of a full parenting agreement.
- Parents are encouraged to seek legal consultation prior to the final mediated agreement being issued.
- Parents can ratify this agreement at court to obtain an enforceable court order.
Mediation is not for everyone…
- The mediator will conduct a screening for intimate partner violence and power imbalances during intake interviews. In certain cases, parents may not be suitable candidates for mediation. However, shuttle mediation (separate virtual rooms) or counsel-assisted mediation may be an option.
- Parents must feel physically and emotionally safe to express their opinions.
- Parents are encouraged to remain open to discussion and compromise. If each parent remains rigidly entrenched in their respective positions, it may be difficult to proceed with mediation.
Closed and Open Mediation
- Most mediation discussions are closed, meaning they remain confidential and cannot be later used in court. The mediator cannot be called as a witness at trial.
- Upon contracted agreement, mediation can be open or partially open, with or without a court order, allowing for court reports or specific information disclosures (e.g., children’s interviews).
Cost & Duration
Cost
Ontario
- Billed at a rate of $225/hour +HST.
- Send payments via Interac e-Transfer® to cbourgeois@chantalbourgeois.ca, or by cheque.
Costs can be split equally, shared proportionally to income, or paid by a single payor.
Total costs depend on the complexity and duration of the case.
Some or all services may be covered by your insurance plan. Please consult your insurance company directly for coverage details.
Québec
- Separating common-law and married couples receive five hours of mediation subsidized by the Québec government, plus a 2.5-hour session on Parenting after Separation (at the local courthouse).
- Parents wishing to have an existing agreement or court order reviewed are entitled to 2.5 hours of subsidized mediation services.
- Once these subsidized hours are used up, parents are charged $225/hour +GST and QST.
Duration
It is difficult to determine how long mediation will last, as it depends on the complexity of each case and each party’s commitment to the negotiation process. Some cases are resolved relatively quickly, but some parents continue to struggle with their pre-existing entrenched conflict playing out in mediation and may need court proceedings to resolve their disagreements.